Women of color face systemic bias at work when promotion goalposts keep moving and ‘emotional labor’ becomes the excuse. In this post, I share how these patterns show up, why they’re unjust, and a free 2-minute EFT tapping guide to process anger, stress, and exhaustion — so you can reclaim power, clarity, and momentum in your career.

If, as you go to engage the room, anxiety and doubt rise in your chest... It’s easy to mistake your uniqueness as something to be fixed or tucked away—like a stained shirt sleeve you’re embarrassed to be wearing.

When your mind floods with doubt, and you wonder if you’re too much—or not enough—here’s the truth you’ve temporarily lost sight of:

You’re allowed to feel both proud and petrified. Brave and unsure.

You don’t have to resolve that tension. You get to be real inside it. That’s one of the most honest, human things you can do.

My client, Kasvi, came into our session feeling frustrated, angry, and rejected.

Her boss had shut down a well-intentioned suggestion for improving team output—something Kasvi offered in good faith to support the team’s performance.

But instead of openness, she hit a wall: “That’s my problem to fix,” said the boss tersely. (Translation: “Stay off my turf.”)

Armed with confidence-boosting tools, my client aced the technical and behavioral interviews. When it became clear an offer was on the table, she reached out to me: "How should I negotiate this?" Here's how we approached it with three key steps…

🦄 Behind the myth of a unicorn startup is burnout.

👉 But burning out doesn’t have to be your destiny when you are wizened to a few truths.

Here’s what went down in coaching today…

My client received an incomplete email about a time-sensitive project from one of her direct reports. Her response requesting the missing information was met with a terse and defensive reply. 

Moments like these have her feeling tension behind her eyes and wondering: 

• Why is my team so mediocre? 

• Is it me? Am I doing something wrong? 

• Can I keep growing my career if I struggle with people like this?

In the interactive workshop, I walk volunteers through exactly how to do peripheral vision and bilateral stimulation, two self-directed neuroplasticity tools I learned from my mentor Melissa Tiers, author of the Anti-Anxiety Toolkit. In the book, Melissa states she intends to get the reader to learn these rapid techniques to rewire the brain FAST and, within minutes, experience a palpable shift in their bodies. Which is precisely what we did in Confidence Lab.

Now is the time to start taking stock of your contributions, so you can gracefully and assertively take credit for your wins and set the stage for your career advancement in conversations before, during, and after the mid-year review. (Or, if going elsewhere is the better answer, in a series of interviews you set up in the coming months.)

I used to be a high-strung, high-anxiety high-achiever who was convinced she wasn't achieving fast enough.

Got downtime on the job? I must be doing something wrong.

Got hired at a hedge fund? My job can't possibly be safe, because I don't know enough.

Like the iPhone, learning the inner logic of our brains is user-friendly and doesn’t require a science degree. You can become skilled at using this inner logic to help you generate more confidence, get promoted, and get better paid.

In this space, we alchemize workplace anxiety, stuckness, and frustration into pragmatic groundedness, forward momentum, and therefore, gratifying self-actualization. 

20 years ago, we were graduating from Smith and had NO idea that we can grow in our careers faster than we thought possible WITHOUT
✅ Overworking
✅ Over-accommodating
✅ Or overthinking the whole thing.
Still working on that last one? You’re not alone.

A few things attendees of my past negotiation webinars have said. The next webinar “The Art of Negotiating Salary, Resources, and More” is on Friday, April 19th, 2024. Register HERE today. Or get the free resources (scripts and replay) HERE.

We explore the profound connection between our foremothers' dreams and our contemporary achievements. We celebrate the legacy of women's liberation and the transformative power of financial freedom.

If you work for a bully who’s a heartless a-hole, my heart goes out to you, and I invite you to try this simple and powerful technique for stress reduction called Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT).

🤦🏾‍♀️ When you’re a woman, a minority in the workplace, you will encounter comments insinuating you should be “grateful” for what you earn now (which makes me so mad… don’t get me started on how sexist that is).

👉🏼 But here’s the thing: your rebuttal does NOT have to be confrontational.

Cindy Gallop and I discussed:

• Women at any age can relish having (more) money and sex

• Ending rape culture and the culture of enabling workplace sexual harassment 

• A vision that upturns our socialized norms about sex and how that can change how we relate to each other and share power in the workplace

Annie, a Corporate Development Director, shifted from feeling stuck in the “weeds” to “wowing” the decision-makers. She set SMART career goals, devised strategies to overcome obstacles, and articulated her vision to senior leadership. Her story can be yours, too.