When people hear “negotiation,” they often picture something adversarial: pounding the table, making threats, trying to “win” at all costs. That’s not how I negotiate, and it’s certainly not how I teach my clients to negotiate.

The women I work with are skilled, thoughtful, and allergic to office politics. They don’t want to turn into jerks to get what they want. They want their income and impact to grow without drama.

That’s where relational negotiation comes in.

No one is coming to crown you. You put the tiara on.

When you bring the locus of control back inside, you’re not denying the reality of bias or structural barriers.

You hold the remote. You choose your next move. You vote—for yourself, with your tribe, and, when needed, with your feet.

That’s what sovereignty looks like in your career.