Gaslighting, Racism, and Leadership: A Coaching Perspective for POC Executives

🤨 How can POC leaders NOT gaslight ourselves navigating the predominantly white world? This was the question a client and I grappled with earlier today.

She — a minority executive — told me about the hyper vigilance she feels at work.

She thought the nervousness and pressure she deftly hides but feels keenly underneath meant she was somehow not measuring up.

🛑 “Wait a minute,” I interjected.

Let’s not gaslight ourselves.

Let’s acknowledge the reality — We do live and work in America in 2025, where white nationalists and white supremacists are heralded in the highest office of state.

To deny *any* stress on the bodies of people of color is to be dangerously naive. To espouse even more fake news.

“Discomfort is not a sign you’re doing it wrong,” I told my client.

“It’s just a sign you’re alive, and it doesn’t mean that you give up on growing your adaptability, resilience, and response-ability.”

💡Just imagine, for a moment, that you can extend 1% more compassion towards yourself.

💗 Compassion moves. It takes action. In the right time and place, it is radical.

🙏 Don’t judge yourself for being human in a deeply fractured world — more so for ambitious people of color.