How Business Owners Handle Salary Doubt: When One Comment Makes You Question Your Decision

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"I used to get paid more somewhere else."

That was the sentence. Almost an afterthought, dropped near the end of an offer negotiation that had gone beautifully. And it was enough to make my client spiral in doubt.

Rewind an hour. My client runs a growing professional services agency. Demand is up, because she’s good at what she does. For five years she hadn't raised her own rates or her team's, and in coaching we'd been working on changing that. 

So she sat down, thought it through, and landed on a number to offer her new hire. A real number. Higher than she’d ever offered someone working for her. It would also be the new floor for everyone who works for her. Rising-tide-lifts-all-boats kind of situation.

After this coaching session, she offered the rate to her new team member. The meeting went well. The new hire was grateful. So excited. Happy. They said yes. 

And then that one sentence. Ever conscientious of treating people well, my client suddenly felt unsure about the whole thing.

Had she lowballed the new hire? Should she retrace her steps, ask around, hunt down the "real" market rate, do more research? An hour earlier she'd been proud of her decision. Now she felt frozen in doubt. 

Here's the follow-up coaching I gave her:

1. Assess facts of the situation — not thoughts, doubts, or suspicions 

Facts: The new hire didn't say the rate was too low. She said yes. She agreed to it. 

2. Honor your spoken commitments

Based on these facts, honor the agreement already reached in the offer negotiation. Being consistent with your commitments keeps things clear and builds trust. 

3. Reframe the doubt as a sign of growth 

I also told her the doubt wasn't a red flag. Sometimes you keep a commitment while your feelings argue with you the whole way. That's not evidence you did something wrong. That's part and parcel of changing and growing your capacity as a leader who makes the decisions. 

4. Keep the door open for future growth 

More facts: The agreed-upon rate is a starting rate. And if my client wanted to raise the rate later, she could. 

Take for example, six months later, once the new hire’s work proved solidly good and the fit was clear, she'd be free to revisit it. The door stays open. She could tell the new hire that outright: “This is the starting rate, and we can look at raising it down the road.” 

Before we wrap up, let me name the current running underneath all this, because it's bigger than one rate negotiation.

We're conditioned, especially as women, and especially around money, to believe the right answer lives somewhere outside us. That there's a correct number out there, and our job is to work hard towards it, to find it, and prove ourselves worthy of it. 

But often there isn't one. Sometimes there's no objective answer and it simply falls to the leader to decide. And when that's the case, it can get tempting to stay stuck — to keep analyzing, keep benchmarking, keep asking around — so you never have to sit with the discomfort of having made your decision. 

That’s the thing to watch out for. There's a version of "let me do more research" that isn't leadership or diligence. It's a way of keeping the decision open so you don't have to stand behind it.

As the decision maker, you’re allowed to choose. You're allowed to back your own decision. And when you hold the line you already drew, consider that could be an act of service for the people you work with. You show people that an agreement with you will be upheld. That your word means something. And that kind of trust is how the tide rises for everyone you bring with you.

If you're a woman running a business or team and you're ready to charge what your work is actually worth — and lift everyone you employ in the process — book a free consultation. When you get better paid, so does everyone rowing with you.